no matter how long..

i tied my best to be whatever it takes to be a good daughter but it just never seem to be enough, even though i did whatever i wad told or needed to do. ive lost tons of people who once upon a time were my friends, now are strangers..

ive given up my passion, hopes and dreams. ive changed and moulded myself to the things that you want me to be. but still i barely get your support what more approval.

i seriously dont know what more i should do. i tried to make you happy in whatever way i can but still i get hurt over and over agin my my own blood. it hurts me more as each day pass.

i realised that i can never live up my broken hopes and dreams, are are shattered and burned to ashes by you.

theres no more purpose of me living in this face of earth anymore. its breaking me more and more as the clock ticks.

you can say im jealous of my own sister, frankly speaking yes i am. everything i wanted to, was a mistake a wrong move and she’s not. whatever i needed was not important but what she want is considered.

you might know the real reason why i have two jobs, its not that just about the money but its because i dont find the need in being at home. this house is not a home to me, its never been home sweet home. this place, is a place where i just have to be at.

ive lost almost every single bit of me when i reached 20. its now just go with the flow. i dont know what is happy, contented, being a real family, having parents to be there for me for everything and support me for all the goods.

so every night i pray that my parents be the parents that they are supposed to be, or for god just take me away from this horrible place. i seriously cant take it anymore, im dying deep inside.

as i lay on the pillow tears will fall till i sleep.


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