No matter what..

I’m clearing my stuffs in my room and also at work, throwing away the old stuffs and all. I guess I need to move on, eventhough its painful and still leaving me empty, its probably the right thing to do..

Somehow the lesser things I owned, seems to be much more easier for me to move forward. Its like I need not think of it anymore, as it is no longer a part of me physically but somehow just mentally.

Today I got a call from Australia, about getting to work there and stuffs. It feels so right to just go, but somehow I also feel that I have to get some other things clear first before I pack my bag and leave. Whatever it is, I know that someday I need to leave.

I gotta come out of my comfort zone, and do things that I never thought of doing and probably chase my dreams.

I checked out a local box, getting a coach per session is $80. I probably need at least 6 session a month, upon that I also have the monthly box fee of $150. All accumulate to half of what I earn.

I was on the verge of leaving the part-time, when the full-time was being a bitch and plans have to put on hold. They are just delaying my yearly allowance, just because my contract ended on the day they should have paid me, and now its 2 weeks late.

Whatever it is, the yearly allowance will be for me stepping into a box, rather than me just throwing dumbbells and jump rope in my room. If I go on just being in my room, I can never be a rightful Cross-fitter.

I’m sick of being the big fat girl, who is able to carry heavy load but is just fat. Not pleasant looking, hard to find clothes, slow, fat! *I’m basically insulting myself, like almost everyone do*

I wanna go somewhere, where people who actually appreciate or be wowed by the strength that I have and probably push myself forward.

If god permits me to do so, I do want to take up Level 1 CF Coaching, next to take up the judges course *probably get a chance to be in the games* and next is to take up CF Kids.

However, I know I still need to work in the cooperate sector before I really make it in CF. I got noone to hang to, and I’m barely even good enough to be a CF athlete.

Moreover, I need to brush up on my drawing skills. I can probably design seasonal tees for Rogue Fitness. I have ideas in my head, but penning it out is another different story.


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